Group Discussion: Why is it important to set boundaries? Where do you set boundaries in your life?
Physical Boundaries: personal space and physical touch. Healthy physical boundaries exist when you acquire self-awareness of physical touch, realize when your personal space is being violated, and understand physical boundaries in relationships. Violation of physical boundaries occurs when someone touches you when you don’t want them to, or when they rummage through your property.
Intellectual Boundaries: thoughts and ideas. Healthy intellectual boundaries include being aware of the appropriate discussion and having respect for others’ ideas. Violation of intellectual boundaries includes dismissing or belittling a person’s thoughts or ideas.
Emotional Boundaries: feelings and emotional awareness. Healthy emotional boundaries exist when you are aware of when to share personal information. A gradual share of personal information as a relationship develops is considered healthy. Revealing too much information early in a relationship is a sign of poor emotional boundaries. Criticizing, depreciating, and undermining a person’s feelings are violations of emotional boundaries.
Sexual Boundaries: emotional, intellectual, and physical aspects of sexuality. When a mutual understanding or respect of limitations and desires between sexual partners exist, healthy sexual boundaries are established. Sexual boundaries are violated when there is unwanted sexual touch, the pressure to engage in sexual acts, leering, and/or sexual comments.
Material Boundaries: money and possessions. Examples of healthy material boundaries are setting limits on what you will share and with whom. Sometimes, it is okay to lend money or a car to a family member but not strangers or people you haven’t known that long. These boundaries are violated when materials are stolen or damaged, or when you are pressured to lend your materials. 
Time Boundaries: how you use your time. Setting time aside for your career, education, family, friends, and hobbies, is a sign of having healthy time boundaries. When someone or something demands too much time from you, that is a violation of your time boundaries.
Personal Boundaries: limits and rules you set for yourself within a relationship. Saying “no” to others when you want to say “yes,” is a sign of healthy personal boundaries. Having healthy personal boundaries also means you are comfortable with intimacy and close relationships.
“Love yourself enough to set boundaries. Your time and energy are precious. You get to choose how you use it. You teach people how to treat you by deciding what you will and won’t accept.” – Anna Taylor
One on One: Answer and discuss the questions below.
Which of the boundaries (listed above) do you currently practice?
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Are your current boundaries working for you? Why or Why not?
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How will you follow through with your boundaries?
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Describe which of the boundaries (listed above) you need to work on and why:
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When setting boundaries, you are also creating and setting consequences. Sharing with others the importance of the boundary you have set can help them understand why there are consequences if they don’t respect your boundary. As you are making changes with your employment and/or education, it is important for you to share with your family, friends, and/or partner your need for them to start respecting your goals or you may need to end the relationship. If you declare consequences, it is important that you follow through or the boundaries won’t be effective and you won’t gain the respect you deserve for changing your future.
Weekly Activity: Determine what you want/need from one close relationship. Then write down what you want to express to one person in your life regarding them supporting your goals. Include your needs, boundaries, and consequences.
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“No. Is a complete sentence” – Anne Lamott
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